When Marriage Isn’t Easy.

Married life is not always smooth and easy. Sometimes everything appears good and it all feels right. This is when the marriage is running smoothly and balanced.

Other times marriage can feel rocky and turbulent or maybe even wildly chaotic. This occurs when the marriage is out of balance.

Over time the latter type of marriage consistently without much time in balance can leave one or both spouses ready to throw in the towel and call it quits.

When the going gets tough the tough get gone?

Divorce nowadays seems to be the go-to answer whenever the slightest problem arises. Some marriages don’t even survive a full year before they are ended.

Yes, there are times when divorce is necessary especially if both parties aren’t willing to sincerely work repairing the union.  However, one shouldn’t hastily make a such a decision.

If you still have a deep love for your spouse and you feel that you have something worth saving it can be well worth the effort to try.


A successful marriage requires two adults behaving like grown-ups, merging their worlds together, simultaneously doing what is best for themselves and for the union.

Focusing on bettering yourself is one of the best ways to improve your marriage because it benefits both of you.

Ego must be kept in check. A marital union requires an equal partnership emotionally and is not focused on one partner’s feelings more than it is about the other’s feelings.

Revenge, hatred, and pettiness have no place in a loving happy marriage. They only make matters worse.

Know this:

In marriage, a person cannot continue to do what you do not allow. It is a choice to accept what your partner does. If you have issues with your marriage the very first person you should examine is yourself.

For example, if you mate consistently chooses to do what upsets you and you have expressed your displeasure with such behavior repeatedly you should ask yourself why you continue to accept it. Only you can answer that question.

You either can accept it and move on or change how you deal with the situation. You can’t change your partner. Only they can do that.

It’s better to part amicably if you must than to stay in the marriage while attempting to annihilate each other emotionally.

A happy marriage doesn’t mean you’ll have a perfect problem-free marriage. There are ups and downs in life and this includes marriage.

Dismiss that which doesn’t serve you and what you can’t live with. Keep the rest. Learn to enjoy life in the moment with your spouse.

Love and light,

Alice Coaxum